Friday, December 12, 2008

Christmas List

As I was cleaning out the toy room downstairs a few days ago, I started thinking about how cluttered our house has gotten since we moved in a few years ago. So much stuff. Lots of toys. Lots of clutter.
I know we don't need this much stuff. I was semi-gladly stuffing toys in boxes to donate to Salvation Army. What to get rid of, what to keep? Some of it had sentimental value. Some did not. Some my kids still loved to play with. Some, not so much. Decisions, decisions. Why is this so hard?
And then I thought, "Come Christmas morning, there will be more toys, more clutter."
I began to think of what is on my 6-year-old's Christmas list. Or should I say lists? Toys, toys and more toys. I had a talk with him that Mommy is going to be going through all of the toys downstairs and separating toys out to give away to other children. At first he was horrified, but when I explained how some children don't have many toys and he has been blessed with more than he can play with, we should get rid of some, and give to others who will be happy to play with them. And there would be room for new toys, then.
That he understood.
I was thinking this all through as I was sorting toys... And of how if it were my husband doing the sorting that much more would be going in the box to donate.
And it struck me.
Why do we hold onto things that make our lives messy? And then invite even more in? Why is it so hard to just put the toys in the box? I know full well that my children's lives will be filled with other things. That they will not be left without. There will be room for new, wonderful, exciting things.
Oh how my life is the same way...
I hold on to things I need to let go of.
Seriously. We probably all do, no?
So I began making a new Christmas List in my head. And now it's time to write it down and share it. Because writing it down, and sharing it, makes it much more real, you know?
This Christmas list is not of things I want to gain, but of things I want to rid my life of. Because I do not need them, and it is pointless to foolishly hold on to what I do not need. More than that, these things not only clutter my life, they can be harmful. They can block out the good.
This year for Christmas I want to rid myself of things that clutter my life and pull me down. Things that irritate me easily. I want to get rid of my laziness and my complacency. My indifference. I want to get rid of my judgmental attitudes. I want to get rid of my fears, the silly ones and the not-so-silly ones. I want to get rid of all the ugliness I carry around.
Why have I held onto these things? Good question. Why?
I don't know.
But I do know that I can choose to let it go, or I can choose to hold on to it. I can give it to God. I can ask for a fresh start.
And for those things I have a hard time letting go of (because face it, this is no easy task,) I can ask for His help.
And in letting go of the old, ugly parts...
I can be filled again. With hope, with kindness, with patience, with love.
And I won't have to look back with regret over the old...
Because I won't miss it.

What is on your Christmas list this year?

1 comment:

Sarah said...

This is an amazing post, and one thing (HUGE0 thing that I have been dealing with lately. You are right...time to let go, and declutter. There is no need to hold on to "stuff" because God should be what fills us completely. Thank you for sharing this and driving home a great point!